Thief!

I stopped a thief the other day.

This woman is a longtime customer with an annoying child.  Both are trashy, but the woman is constantly stealing things while letting her child wander the store causing trouble.

No caption required.

On this particular day, she went through the self-checkouts.  After pestering me several times to help her do things that she's done a hundred times (she always uses self-checkout), she forced me to stop what I was doing and proceeded to tell me that the machine wasn't registering the money she'd put in.

We hate these too.  I promise.

I'm going to be bluntly honest, I've fallen for this a time or two.  She's pretty good at spotting the machines that are being glitchy that day and going to them.  Unfortunately for her, once I count everything up that night, I know damn well why things are off.  This time around, she tried to tell me that she'd put a 20 into the machine and it wasn't registering it.  So I popped the machine open and had a look for myself.

The most recent bill accepted wasn't a 20.  It was a 5 dollar bill.  And Smirky McBitch knew it.

I don't know her name.  That's her name now.

Hi!  My name is Smirky McBitch, and I'll be your crook today!

I smiled and shut the machine.  I told her that the most recent bill wasn't a 20 and she must be mistaken.  She starts asking her twit of a child if he'd taken it, what must've happened, oh lord, what horrible mistakes we're making to not believe her.....so I get my direct supervisor, Ellen.

Who is a total badass.

As soon as the thief saw saw her, the woman changed her tune, asking me if the bill was a 5 and insisting that she, not I, must have been mistaken.  Talking to Ellen later, turns out that she's already threatened this woman with a ban before because of her thieving antics.

Now the thief knows I'm on to her too.  Maybe she won't cause as much trouble next time.  Maybe she'll take her ugly child to another store to rob.

Yeah, I said it.  Kid's fugly.